10086 Sunset Boulevard

Pamela is getting a divorce again. I missed the part where she married this latest gem. What rock does she find these guys under?

Once upon a time Pamela was a natural beauty with a natural body. I don’t know what she’s done to her face, but we all know the story of her breasts, implants in, implants out, implants become replants. She is the plastic doll, the ultimate dumb blond. At what point did she decide that she would rather look like an inflate-a-mate than the lovely girl in the picture? Perhaps becoming the plastic bleached blond bombshell gave her a shot at bigger financial gain than she would have if she had remained as beautiful as she once was. Within a year of this photograph, part of a Playboy spread, she had begun the transformation.

It did allow her to meet and marry fine specimens of manhood including Paris Hilton’s mistake. It gave her the opportunity to become a high paid porn star.

Making one’s living by being a sex symbol has to be the pits, once the years start mounting up. It’s hard enough for the rest of us to deal with the traces of time, without public scrutiny, but where does Pam have to go from here? More plastic surgery? Bigger boobs, smaller boobs? No matter what she does, I think she’s doomed to become a parody of her former self. The face is already pretty comical, in a sad, soulless way.

I was eating my breakfast of egg beaters and bologna a la Will and I turned on the television to see what was going on in the world. The View was on and I was about to change the channel when someone caught my eye. It was Star Jones, but it took me a minute to be sure of that. What the hell happened to her? I know from experience that weight loss can alter a person’s face, but this is just strange. I used to think Star Jones was an attractive woman, but she’s anything but that now. Scary stuff. If you want to know what I’m talking about go and check out the pictures over at Gallery of the Absurd.